Hi Nan,
my question about agreement was a more general one but as you are a woman & I am a man
it still applies to us too.
The funny thing about this is that I will be trying to get an agreement from you
on the concept of agreement. It might not even be possible. But then again I do believe that with awareness
and understanding anything can be achieved.

I think an Agreement is just a step after an accepted Argument.
Not “having an argument” but rather “making one’s argument” or line of thinking to get the others feedback
and ultimately agreement on.
That an agreement is only as good as the next argument.
And after the argument is the next, improved agreement (hopefully), or possibly an ending of the relationship even.

To me the “agreement” is so much more flexible than the “promise” and more realistic as
I doubt that I can promise anything not knowing what I am going to learn tomorrow.

So for me “agreement & argument” go hand in hand & something I aim for.

As opposed to what I think is used more commonly in relationships, which is the “promise – compromise”
e.g. a marriage is based on the idea of promise & the compromise, I think, with people promising to
stay together for life & nearly 50% failing to live up to such a promise and the whole
thing full of compromises anyway. (Funny I only discovered recently that the word compromise could also
be pronounced com promise)

I hope you can understand this point I am trying to make & I hope you would prefer the idea of
Agreement-Argument rather than Promise-Compromise. I have never met anyone that has agreed with me on this idea only
Stephen so far.

This is my first point of Argument that I am hoping to get our first Agreement on.

Any feedback much appreciated.