I woke up this morning and retrofitted my past interesting discussions.
If my framework (I call it RethinkPerfect) is as useful as I think it is then I should be able to apply it to my past "interesting" discussions. Yes, they were interesting to me in the past, so much so that I can still recall the words, sentences, and context from 13 years ago as though it was yesterday.
So I applied my tools and yes, I think they would have been successful especially if I made sure that I had an agreement, with the person that I had the interesting discussions with, that we use or try these tools out before our "interesting" discussion actually took place (and got out of hand).
For me preparation is king and although I have prepared afterwards (that it the Irish in me) I can now retrofit my past life as my first "use" or "practice" in forming my "habit" for my framework.
I feel confident that if I get similar initial agreements, with the people I encounter in the future, I can avoid the conflict that can and has occurred during “interesting” discussions without these simple tools of engagement being temporally agreed to, with me.
Without this willingness to try on both our sides I will not be engaging, it is that simple and “my democratic right”, as Graeme pointed out about Maslow and my hierarchy of needs.
Anyone wishing to hear my six simple rules of engagement, that I wish to be agreed to before discussion, can let me know. If there are no takers I will understand and please ignore this post.