What is Resentment
I think resentment is the build up of anger (compound anger), over time, towards someone and ourselves for allowing a relationship or situation to get into the position that it is in now. It is sort of a feedback loop, in that we have anger for our own anger and we
have no real idea how to resolve this problem.
Flawed Relationship Resulting in Resentment
How do We Resolve Resentment
I think by apologising to the person we attribute our resentment to, for not setting up
a process for dealing with our anger and potential resentment before the disputes and anger occurred.
Ideal Relationship where anger is dealt with
What is the Process for Dealing with Anger
I call it Rethink Perfect and it involves getting flexible and explicit agreements on:
- That anger is understandable but not acceptable.
- That we are both accountable for anger, one for their anger and the other for allowing it.
- Agree to use proposed rules of engagement as a counter balance for our bias/fears, before we enter into deep and real conversations.
Rethink Perfect Counter Balance Agreement using 6 rules of engagements all beginning with A