An interesting pattern seems to be revealing itself to me lately. As I ask people if they agree with the statement or the 1st tool of engagement “If you lost it, you have lost it”. The people that like to get angry at others and blame them for getting them angry will not agree to this premise. While people that are less prone to losing their cool will easily agree to this and shake my hand.
This is turning out ot be a great measure for me to steer clear of anyone that I cannot get this agreement with.
What do you think? Do think if you lose your cool you have lost the conversation?
rethink PERFECT 
i agree – i you lose it, you’ve lost the right to stay in the conversation.
i think the way back into the conversation, is to give an acceptable apology.