“From now on…” is one of the most powerful agreements that I have gotten with my brother Steve. It is what we have agreed to use when we want to pose a concept that we wish the other to help convert.
This agreement is a potential break though in how we will relate from now on, as it means that we will no longer feel compelled to use sarcasm or rhetorical questions to begin to convert our concepts. We still might fall back into our old ways on occasion but by making this agreement we will be able to identify when this occurs.
It also means that we have a much more superior method than
By crafting a possible solution first and having the courage to ask the other to help them convert our concept we are by passing the dispute process that can be so inefficient, taking up so much time energy and can be emotionally scaring.
This agreement is also built upon our previous agreement that we only try to convert our own concepts not the others.
Previously we might have complained like “ I’m sick of the way you do that…” or firing off rhetorical questions like “why do you always do it …..”.
So instead of trying to convert him or his actions, I get him to help me convert my concepts by giving me his feedback on my “From now on I would like us to…” statement.
How we delivers the feedback is another story and agreement, that I will cover in chapter 6 DFM –Direct Feedback Moment