You’re Pissing Me Off

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To me the second most primitive way of approaching an argument or dispute is to
accuse the other person of starting to piss me off.
And the most primitive way, in my view, is to outright accuse the other person of now actually pissing me off.

And here is why:

  1. Because no-one-person is a problem for me, it is what they say and do.
  2. And because it is not even their behavior or what they say that “pisses me off”.
    The thing that is getting me angry is ME, in that I did not prepare and have agreed rules of engagement with this person before we had the conversation.

And the reason I think it is so primitive is, that if I get angry because of me and my lack of preparation, I can simply apologise for my anger,
ie  “I am sorry for getting angry as I could have prepared beforehand to avoid getting to this point.”
But if I am blaming the other person for making me angry, it seems to me, to be very difficult to apologise for “my anger” when I believe that you were actually responsible for it. In effect it is not my anger it is yours.

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