Everyone who has ever watched Maxwell Smart knows that the opposite to Control is Chaos. Control are the good guys and Chaos are the baddies, ha!

Most people fear Chaos or loosing control and we will even go so far as try to control someone else in order to keep control of our own lives.

This fear of loosing control or chaos is common in both men and women.

One of the first signs of loosing control is anger, it occurs both because of our fear of loosing control and also results in us loosing further control, forming a feedback loop. The more angry we get the more we loose control and more we loose control the more angry we get.

So how do we take back control? In my view we can do it by reducing anger in our lives, from others and especially from ourselves.

Feeling shocked is another sign of losing control. Recognising this feeling and simply saying to oneself that “I seem shocked” is a good way of gaining control and stopping this feedback loop of external and internal stimuli.

Finally, entering into an intimate relationship throws any idea of control out of the window, especially if we go on to have a child. Being prepared for the lack of control or chaos, i.e. not feeling shocked when this chaotic experience occurs, will help us cope in this situation.

Preparing  for Chaos is a great way to maintain Control,

Prepare well GH.

PS Maybe the opposite is true also.

Preparing for control is a great way to maintain chaos. 

Marriage vows that last forever can have that effect along with totalitarian governments security laws.